Wow, well that took years. Nah just kidding, but it did take a long time for me to find a theme for my blog. I never knew how difficult it was to start a blog. It took me at least thirty minutes to find the perfect theme. I always like to choose a theme that I think matches my personality. I wanted something fun, with also a hint of rebellion. I didn’t want to opt for the full on neon colors theme but I also didn’t want any skulls and cross bones either. I settled for this one, and I think it’s a pretty, good match for the time being. Okay, now to really, begin.
I’ve wanted to start a blog for years; but first off, I didn’t know where to start, and second, I didn’t know what to write. It’s actually shocking to me now though. Even if I have only experienced sixteen years of life so far, I feel as though I’ve lived a lifetime. With all that’s happened in my life, I feel like I could write a book write now. I’m not trying to brag and say my life is perfect, because let’s face it, who’s is? However, I do feel like I’ve had a lot of ups and downs and it’s sad, because this is only the beginning of my life. I’m the kind of girl who always wanted her life to be just like all the books I used to scour over and practically live by. I wanted my knight in shining armor to find me, just like all the girls I envied in the books. I realized a little too late, that if I wanted a prince charming, I should have made a lot of guy friends when I was younger.
I always did go for the rebellious type, the bad boy, who had a sensitive side. Like this:
<——- Now that’s hot. There were more pictures, but I liked him because he had blue eyes. Anyways, moving on from my fantasies. Ah yes, we were at the subject of how I pictured my life. So, I was hoping that I would end up falling in love by the beginning of high school, but that didn’t work out so well. I mean I’m already going into my third year of high school and still no boyfriend. Then I look at my friends who have already gone through at least two boyfriends already. One of which is already on her third. And don’t get me wrong they both look absolutely, adorable with their new beaus, but I want one too.
But enough of my ranting, onto a new subject. That was just one of the many problems in my continuous life. Let’s take for example, the fact that I don’t have many guy friends. I admit I was never really, that popular when I was younger.
I envied that as well, about the girls in my books. I wasn’t popular which meant that I didn’t have many guy friends…scratch that, I didn’t have any guy friends. I mean I knew a lot of guys, but they weren’t really my friends. They were more like acquaintances.
So I pretty much went through life without guys. But, when I was younger, i didn’t really care. It’s when I got to middle school and I finally realized that boys were importnat, that I started to care….
I’ll finish this tomorrow when I wake up because it’s getting really late. So gd’night
Okay I’m back. So as I was saying, we were on the subject of boys in my life. By the time I got to high school, I had a real problem. I didn’t talk to many guys and most of my friends were girls. That wasn’t a big problem considering the fact that I was a girl, however, I knew maybe about two guys and that was the major problem. I started to realize how much of a dilemma I was in, so I strategized. I talked to more boys, sat next to guys, and tried to put my self in more groups with guys. I even went to the football games with my friends, hoping that would get me into the “in” crowds. Nothing prevailed and I lost hope. I mean, I did make a few new guy friends, but they were all duds. Cute and sweet, but not exactly, what I was looking for. Then I met him…He was tall, cute, devilish smile, hung out with my group of friends a lot, and totally, rebellious. He needed looking after, and I was willing to provide that for him. Heck, I was willing to provide anything for him.
It’s funny though because when I first met him, we didn’t get along. All of my friends thought he was a little creepy, because he followed us around everywhere. I just followed my friends’ opinions, without making my own judgment of him. He seemed decent enough in my opinion. He left for a few months and I though I’d never see him again. But he returned at the end of the school year and my heart did a few leaps. He was absolutely, perfect again. That opinion changed by the fall of tenth grade. He had completely gone to the dark side. He was skinny jeans, flannel shirt, minus the flippy skater hair status. He had become the ultimate “poser”; however, I kind of liked it. But once again I went with my friends’ opinions and mocked him about his new look.
Although I found it cute and slightly sexy, I sided with my friends and called him a poser and a fish and anything else we came up with. He was perfect in my eyes…that is, until he started his “habits”. First, it started with ditching school, and then we learned he had been hanging out with some girl. I wanted to kill him, how dare he miss school for stupid whore. Of course, he got mad when we called him out on it. He claimed that he had ‘just wanted to show her how much he cared for her’. Here’s the exact conversation he had with one of my friends.
I’ve wanted to start a blog for years; but first off, I didn’t know where to start, and second, I didn’t know what to write. It’s actually shocking to me now though. Even if I have only experienced sixteen years of life so far, I feel as though I’ve lived a lifetime. With all that’s happened in my life, I feel like I could write a book write now. I’m not trying to brag and say my life is perfect, because let’s face it, who’s is? However, I do feel like I’ve had a lot of ups and downs and it’s sad, because this is only the beginning of my life. I’m the kind of girl who always wanted her life to be just like all the books I used to scour over and practically live by. I wanted my knight in shining armor to find me, just like all the girls I envied in the books. I realized a little too late, that if I wanted a prince charming, I should have made a lot of guy friends when I was younger.
I always did go for the rebellious type, the bad boy, who had a sensitive side. Like this:
<——- Now that’s hot. There were more pictures, but I liked him because he had blue eyes. Anyways, moving on from my fantasies. Ah yes, we were at the subject of how I pictured my life. So, I was hoping that I would end up falling in love by the beginning of high school, but that didn’t work out so well. I mean I’m already going into my third year of high school and still no boyfriend. Then I look at my friends who have already gone through at least two boyfriends already. One of which is already on her third. And don’t get me wrong they both look absolutely, adorable with their new beaus, but I want one too. But enough of my ranting, onto a new subject. That was just one of the many problems in my continuous life. Let’s take for example, the fact that I don’t have many guy friends. I admit I was never really, that popular when I was younger.
I envied that as well, about the girls in my books. I wasn’t popular which meant that I didn’t have many guy friends…scratch that, I didn’t have any guy friends. I mean I knew a lot of guys, but they weren’t really my friends. They were more like acquaintances. So I pretty much went through life without guys. But, when I was younger, i didn’t really care. It’s when I got to middle school and I finally realized that boys were importnat, that I started to care….
I’ll finish this tomorrow when I wake up because it’s getting really late. So gd’night
Okay I’m back. So as I was saying, we were on the subject of boys in my life. By the time I got to high school, I had a real problem. I didn’t talk to many guys and most of my friends were girls. That wasn’t a big problem considering the fact that I was a girl, however, I knew maybe about two guys and that was the major problem. I started to realize how much of a dilemma I was in, so I strategized. I talked to more boys, sat next to guys, and tried to put my self in more groups with guys. I even went to the football games with my friends, hoping that would get me into the “in” crowds. Nothing prevailed and I lost hope. I mean, I did make a few new guy friends, but they were all duds. Cute and sweet, but not exactly, what I was looking for. Then I met him…He was tall, cute, devilish smile, hung out with my group of friends a lot, and totally, rebellious. He needed looking after, and I was willing to provide that for him. Heck, I was willing to provide anything for him.
It’s funny though because when I first met him, we didn’t get along. All of my friends thought he was a little creepy, because he followed us around everywhere. I just followed my friends’ opinions, without making my own judgment of him. He seemed decent enough in my opinion. He left for a few months and I though I’d never see him again. But he returned at the end of the school year and my heart did a few leaps. He was absolutely, perfect again. That opinion changed by the fall of tenth grade. He had completely gone to the dark side. He was skinny jeans, flannel shirt, minus the flippy skater hair status. He had become the ultimate “poser”; however, I kind of liked it. But once again I went with my friends’ opinions and mocked him about his new look.
Although I found it cute and slightly sexy, I sided with my friends and called him a poser and a fish and anything else we came up with. He was perfect in my eyes…that is, until he started his “habits”. First, it started with ditching school, and then we learned he had been hanging out with some girl. I wanted to kill him, how dare he miss school for stupid whore. Of course, he got mad when we called him out on it. He claimed that he had ‘just wanted to show her how much he cared for her’. Here’s the exact conversation he had with one of my friends.
Friend: Well no one saw you for days and we thought you got in trouble….. As in, you’re out of the school
Poser: Nope. Trust me that is not going to happen to me. And I’ve been busy with some girls and being out on the street
Friend: Yeah. That’s basically you not in school and we all think your new making money idea will be to become a pimp.
Poser: Nope. I won’t have to do that because I have money it’s just that my parents took it away.
Friend: Yeah but no one’s seen you in school so your not going?
Poser: Ah cause I’m sort of ditching to spend time with this one girl at her house alone.
Friend: That’s smart. Not going to school so you can drop fail and repeat 10th grade
Poser: No, I just want to show how much I care for her
See how stupid he had become? But that was just the beginning. It started with the ditching, and then he decided to come back to school. We were all relieved, and then he had to go and screw it up again. He though it would be funny if he came to school drunk and then after that he got tired of “coming to school” like that. He decided it was even better if he got drunk at school! Then he started hi-jacking cop cars. He jumped the fence and hotwired a cop car outside of our school. Then somehow, he ended up with the keys to the car. It just became really, ridiculous. Soon after that, he dropped out of school again. His mom, worried for his safety, called the police and they put him on house arrest, but that didn’t stop him. He got out of the bracelet and ran away. Somehow, he ended up in a rehab center for children like him, somewhere in Utah. When I heard he had disappeared, I cried for days. My friend had to keep me updated on anything about him. I felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest, and he didn’t even know what pain he had caused.
I went on like that for a few months. Then homecoming came along, and my heart was restored. That is until I realized the guy I was now crushing on, was a major playboy. But I figured that out a few months ago. As in, May-ish and homecoming was in November. But at least I had been restored enough to carry on with my life. I just wish my badboy could have been in own for my birthday. The playboy came, but he was so rude that he left without saying bye. He didn’t even apologize the next day. But enough about him, I think this concluded my boys portion of my life. Hahaha so until my next blog, you guys will just have to wait and see what I dish out next.
This blogging stuff is actually pretty, fun. I feel like a weight has been lifted from me. I can express everything I’m feeling here and I won’t get yelled at it. I can blog from wherever and whenever I feel like. My next blog should be up by the end of this week, and then I’ll probably also post one from the Bahamas. Now I’m off to read! TTFN *I miss Tigger*
*greenswimgirl14*
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